Mom Rage We Meet Again…
The Unseen Struggle of Mom Rage
This weekend was a tough one. My kids were whiny, my husband was grumpy, and I felt extra short on patience. The days dragged on, filled with battles with my son over everything from which shoes to wear to whether he’d come on a walk with me. I made a lot of food, washed a lot of dishes, and folded a mountain of laundry. I did my best to carve out moments of self-care—a morning hike with the dog, a final dip in the pool before the weather cools. But none of it worked. I was overwhelmed. By Sunday evening, after asking my kids for the hundredth time to get along, I hit a breaking point. The sounds and tension became too much, and I finally exploded. Yelling, crying—the whole adult meltdown.
Then came the guilt, the grief, and the deep pangs of imposter syndrome. How could I, someone who supports others with self-regulation tools and lives by the power of breathwork, end up here?
There are countless articles and books on this topic (I’ll link a few of my favorites below), but it’s not something I’ve ever really discussed with other moms—even though, if I’m honest, it’s why I started HEN Mindfulness in the first place. It’s why I found breathwork, in my search for something to help me manage my own emotional struggles. I’ve often felt alone and embarrassed by the intensity of my emotions, unable to imagine any other mother capable of yelling at her kids the way I sometimes do. There’s no Instagram photo or reel for that.
That night, after the kids were in bed and the tears had dried, I sat alone in my office, trying to locate where the rage had come from and what it was trying to tell me. What was I not giving myself? What were the triggers, the signs I missed? Sitting with that anger, here’s what I heard:
The anger rises from the center of my chest like a sharp dagger.
I can feel it building when my mental load gets too heavy and I don’t feel appreciated.
My kids’ constant whining and yelling fuels a story that something is wrong, that we shouldn’t be this way, and this creates fear inside me.
Solo self-care doesn’t make it disappear (though it certainly helps)—resolution and reconnection with my family are what really help me reset.
Meeting myself with acceptance and forgiveness is key to shifting and self-regulating.
If you’ve been here, if you’ve felt any version of this, I see you. I see the shame and guilt you carry for your beautifully imperfect humanness. Raising little humans is intense—it’s brought me to my knees and lifted me to the highest peaks, filling me with a love that’s both overwhelming and all-encompassing. We’re in this together. I’m not here to tell you to stop feeling what you feel, but I will tell you that you’re not alone. Let’s keep talking about this. Let’s keep observing and creating awareness. We are capable of shifting our reactions, and I believe mindfulness and breathwork are among the tools that can support us on this journey.
